Dear Piper,

What do think of this as a philosophy for life? “Choose not the greatest quantity of food but the most tastiest.”

–Ashton

Dear Ashton,

Is this something you already subscribe to or are you trying it on for size? When trying philosophies on for size I find it’s useful to employ the ‘fortune cookie’ test. You know, when you add ‘in bed’ at the end. So if the fortune cookie says, ‘You will have great luck today,’ the fortune cookie test translates it to, ‘You will have great luck today in bed.’ See how we’ve ended up with a much, much better fortune? However, if the fortune cookie says something like, ‘You will see your mother today,’ well, you get the picture. Utilizing this theorem ‘Choose not the greatest quantity of food but the most tastiest in bed,’ is a completely acceptable and logical philosophy for life.

–Piper